Join Intimo Today
 |
 |
|
Get Help - Support Services
You are Not Alone
If you are experiencing domestic violence, support and assistance is available. It is sometimes hard to tell your story and ask for help - but remember no one should have to live in fear. Talk with someone you trust or contact one of the support services listed below.
Confidential Hotline 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) Contacts
NationalEmergency 000 Confidential Helpline: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) is a free confidential service for any Australian experiencing or who has experienced domestic or family violence and/or sexual assault. It is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. www.1800respect.org.au Lifeline 13 11 14 Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800 Mensline 1300 78 99 78 |
|
VictoriaWomen's Domestic Violence Crisis Service Family Life The Jewish Taskforce Against Family Violence Support Line |
QueenslandDVConnect dvconnect womensline dvconnect mensline |
New South WalesThe Benevolent Society New South Wales Domestic Violence Line |
Western AustraliaWomen's Domestic Violence Helpline Women's Domestic Violence Helpline |
South AustraliaDomestic Violence Help Line |
Northern TerritoryCrisis Line |
TasmaniaDomestic Violence Crisis Service
|
New ZealandCrisis Line 0508 744 633 |
Get the Facts
To find out more about Domestic Violence, where you can access support or how you can raise awareness of this crucial issue, click on the links below.
|
|
Call the |
What do I do if she tells me? |
Want more |
It's Everybody's Business |
Please read the below booklets for more facts and information regarding Domestic Violence-
What is Domestic Violence?
Definition
 |
Intimo Aware Fact SheetWhat is Domestic Violence? |
Domestic and family violence is any behaviour or behaviours used by one person to establish and maintain power and control over another person in the domestic or family situation or relationship, and which causes the victim to live with fear. It is a form of bullying and is a significant health, social and economic issue for the Australian community.
Types of Behaviour
Power and Control - Domestic violence is not the same as an argument or relationship conflict. A 'fair fight' can never take place if one partner is fearful of the other. Domestic violence is used to maintain power and control over another person. Controlling behaviours such as possessiveness, jealousy, put downs and threats are often evident before a relationship becomes physically violent.
- Social Abuse - Isolating from others - restricting social life and making it difficult for to have friends and maintain social contact with family.
- Physical Assault - Hitting, slapping, pushing, grabbing, kicking, pulling hair or threatening physical harm, breaking things, punching walls or driving a car dangerously.
- Verbal Abuse - Insults, name calling and swearing
- Economic Abuse- Taking control of the finances and limiting the amount of and access to money and funds.
- Psychological and Emotional Abuse- Constant criticism and put downs, sulking, ignoring, humiliation.
- Sexual Abuse - Demands and forcing a person to participate in acts they do not wish to perform.
Incidence
Due to the sensitive nature of the issue of domestic violence, it is difficult to accurately measure the incidence of domestic violence as it often goes unreported. However in 1996, the Australian Bureau of Statistics conducted a national survey, which found that 23% of women who have ever been married or in a de facto relationship has experienced physical violence from a male partner. Australian Bureau of Statistics (1996).Women’s Safety Australia. Similar results have been reported in New Zealand and other developed countries. According to the World Health Organisation, in every country where reliable, large-scale studies have been conducted, results indicate that between 10% and 50% of women report they have been physically abused by an intimate partner in their lifetime. World Health Organisation (2001) Violence Against Women Fact Sheet.
What are the effects of Domestic Violence?
|
Intimo Aware Fact SheetWhat are the effects of |
Domestic violence has wide ranging physical, medical, emotional, social and psychological consequences including anxiety, depression and other emotional distress, physical stress symptoms, sleep disturbances, suicide attempts, alcohol and drug abuse, reduced coping and problem solving skills, loss of self esteem and confidence, social isolation, fear of starting new relationships.
The Physical Impact
A recent Victorian study found that intimate partner violence is the leading contributor to death, disability and illness in Victorian women aged 15-44, being responsible for more of the disease burden than many well know risk factors such as high blood pressure, smoking and obesity. Department of Human Services Victoria (2004). The Health Costs of Violence. Measuring the Burden of Disease caused by Intimate Partner Violence.
According to Jo Cavanagh, CEO of Southern Family Life in Melbourne, “Women in abusive relationships are often on prescription medication for depression or to help them sleep and regularly struggle with heavy use of tobacco and alcohol Changing these damaging conditions and habits is extremely difficult when the abuse has led them to feel worthless and think so negatively about themselves”.
The Psychological Impact
A South Australian study2 conducted in 1998 found that the psychological, verbal and emotional abuse was far more devastating and long lasting in its effect than physical violence. "Victims reported that psychological and emotional abuses were built into their relationships, and occurred around the 'little things' of daily life. Most victims reported that the threats of physical violence were as powerful in controlling them as the actual incidences of violence. This was because the perpetrators had shown that they were capable of carrying out the threats. South Australian Department of Human Services, Adelaide (1998) South Australian Health Goals and Targets: Violence and Abuse Priority Areas.
Domestic Violence and Children
Children are often the "silent victims" of domestic violence. Even though they may not be the victims of physical violence the exposure to this type of behaviour and relationship model has severe consequences.The ABS Women's Safety Survey found that of the women who experienced violence by a current partner, 61 per cent reported that they had children in their care at some time during the relationship, and 38 per cent said that these children had witnessed the violence. Australian Bureau of Statistics (1996) Women’s Safety Australia.
The research report, Family Violence: A Whole Family Approach4 found that children living in families experiencing domestic violence are gravely affected even when they are not the targets of the abuse. The impact of witnessing violence can not be differentiated from the impact of experiencing direct violence. Hewitt & Cavanagh (2000) Family Violence: A Whole Family Approach.
Download a copy of the Intimo Aware Flyer
The Stats
A Snapshot
|
Intimo Aware Fact SheetThe Statistics |
The following statistics have been reproduced from a variety of reports and surveys. They paint a sobering picture of the incidence and impacts of domestic violence.
- 23% of women who have ever been married or in a de facto relationship has experienced physical violence from a male partner. Australian Bureau of Statistics (1996) Women’s Safety Australia.
- This survey also found that of the women who had experienced domestic violence, 20 per cent experienced domestic violence for the first time while they were pregnant. Australian Bureau of Statistics (1996) Women’s Safety Australia.
- 58% of sexual assaults are committed by someone known to the victim. Australian Bureau of Statistics(2002) Crime and Safety Survey
- Most assaults against women where the victim knows the offender go unreported. Carlos Carcach, Australian Institute of Criminology, (1998) Reporting Crime to the Police
- Intimate partner violence is responsible for more ill health and premature death in Victorian women under the age of 45 than any other of the well-known risk factors, including high blood pressure, obesity and smoking. Department of Human Services Victoria (2004) The Health Costs of Violence. Measuring the Burden of Disease caused by Intimate Partner Violence.
- Ninety percent of children present in violent homes have witnessed the violence perpetrated against their mother. Queensland Domestic Violence Taskforce(1998).
- It is estimated that the economic cost of domestic violence on Australian businesses exceeds $1.5 billion a year. Henderson M (2000) Impacts and Costs of Domestic Violence on the Australian Business Corporate Sector Brisbane: Lord Mayor’s Women’s Advisory Committee, Brisbane City Council
Get Involved
You can make a difference. Whether it is by breaking the silence by openly discussing domestic violence, supporting and assisting a family member, friend or work colleague who is in an abusive relationship or by promoting healthy and respectful relationships in the home and workplace.
What Can I Do?
- Recognise, Respond and Refer
- Promote Healthy Relationships
- Make a Difference in your Workplace
- Be Aware
Recognise, Respond and Refer
Family and friends are the most important first line of help when a person is struggling to deal with an abusive relationship. As a friend you can make an important difference to the ability and willingness of your friend to seek help. By adopting the three “R”s you can help and support a friend in need.
Recognise
Recognise the signs that someone may be suffering from domestic violence.
These may include:
- Regularly absent from work
- Wears inappropriate clothing
- Experiences frequent physical injuries
- Exhibits emotional distress
- Cries easily and exhibits mood swings
- Is often distracted and not attentive
- Appears obsessed with time
- Receives frequent personal phone calls
- Seems tired and sleep deprived
Respond
You might approach by asking questions that demonstrate your concern for their wellbeing. It could be as simple as “Is everything ok? Can I help in any way?". Encourage, but do not pressure them to discuss the abuse. Respect their privacy and maintain confidentiality. Do not break their trust. Believe their story and listen without making judgments. Acknowledge their fears and take their concerns seriously. Let them know that they are not alone, not at fault and do not deserve to be treated in an abusive manner. Do not tell them what to do or offer to speak to their partner. Don’t tell them to work harder within the relationship or stay because of the children. Give them time to make their own decisions.
Refer
Provide them with information on where they can access help.
Healthy Relationships
A healthy relationship is one based on mutual respect, equality, trust and support. You can promote healthy and respectful relationships both in the home, workplace and in your social life by recognising the fundamentals of equality. Remember, conflict itself is not always negative. However, a 'fair fight' can never take place if the relationship is not built on mutual respect and one partner is fearful of the other.
Elements of an Equal Relationship
- Mutual Trust
- Shared decision making
- Shared responsibility
- Economic partnership
- Support for each others individual endeavours
- Open communication
- Negotiation and Fairness
- Honesty
- Non threatening behaviour
Traits of a Healthy Family
The healthy family....
- communicates and listens
- affirms and supports one another
- teaches respect for others
- develops a sense of trust
- has a sense of play and humor.
- exhibits a sense of shared responsibility
- teaches a sense of right and wrong.
- has a strong sense of family in which rituals and traditions abound
- has a balance of interaction among members
- has a shared sense of values
- respects the privacy of one another
- values service to others
- fosters honest conversation
- shares leisure time
- admits and seeks help with problems
Thank You to the Corporate Alliance Against Domestic Violence for the Traits of a Healthy Family. You can visit their website at www.caepv.org
Domestic Violence is Everybody’s Business
Domestic violence destroys a person's sense of safety and has profound personal effects that spill over into the workplace in a number of ways. It has been estimated the domestic violence costs Australian businesses in excess of $1 billion dollars.
The Economic Costs of Domestic Violence
People who live with violence or fear in their personal lives are affected in their work performance as their confidence, self-esteem, and their ability to perform at their best are all compromised. As a result, the person's productivity, customer service and attendance are affected and have wider impacts on staff turnover, absenteeism and the wellbeing of co-workers. Equally, some employees who use abuse in their domestic relationships may use workplace time and resources to do so which also impacts productivity, workplace relationships and the organisational environment.
What can a workplace do?
- Acknowledge that domestic violence is a workplace issue
- Display posters in communal areas and distribute domestic violence literature and support service details in places where employees can access them anonymously
- Implement a Domestic Violence workplace policy and make it clear to all employees that the organisation is committed to a no tolerance policy on domestic violence.
- Educate employees on domestic violence with guest speakers. Teach employees how to recognise the signs of abuse.
- Ensure that the workplace is safe and secure. (eg. adequate lighting in the carpark. secure entry)
Be Aware
Information and education is key to raising awareness on domestic violence. If you want to learn more, you may find the
following resources useful.
You are Not Alone
If you are experiencing domestic violence, support and assistance is available. It is sometimes hard to tell your story and ask for help - but remember no one should have to live in fear. Talk with someone you trust or contact one of the support services listed below.
Confidential Hotline 1800 200 526
|
|
|
I don't want my partner |
Safety Plan
- Safety Plan for Women Living in Potentially Violent Situations
- Important Items Checklist
- Erasing Computer Files
Safety Plan for Women living in potentially violent situations
Be Prepared
Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviours. If it has happened once it is likely to occur again. It is therefore very important to be prepared and create your personal safety plan to protect yourself.
Safety Plan
- Leave $10 or more and an extra set of car keys hidden outside your house or at a neighbour's house.
- Keep important documents (birth certificates, medical records, financial records, marriage certificate/licence etc.) and extra clothing at a friend's house or hidden near an exit.
- Try to develop friendships with neighbours, tell those who you can trust about the violence. Ask them to agree to call the police if they hear suspicious noise coming from your house.
- Develop a code word with two friends that lets them know that you need to get out now.
- Let your child's teacher and school principal know enough about the situation to respond supportively in the crisis. Try to get them to agree to not release the children to their father, should you report to them that you are about to leave home.
- Decide now where you will go, how you will get there etc. the next time he becomes violent. (Do this even if you really don't think there will be a next time).
If you tell him that you will leave if he ever hits you again, think about whether you're giving him permission to hit you "just one more time". - Try to avoid arguments in the bathroom, in the garage, in the kitchen, near weapons or any other place that has sharp or heavy equipment/instruments around.
- If he seems to be "building up" and you can't safely leave, try to keep your back towards an open space NOT a corner.
- Always remember, you do not deserve to be hurt
Thank You
Thank You to the Southern Family Life for these details. SFL are a not for profit community organisation based in Melbourne. You can visit their website at www.familylife.com.au or contact them on 03 9598 2133
Important Item Checklist
If you need to leave home quickly, it may help to have a number of important items within easy access that you can take with you.
Checklist
- medicare card
- health care cards
- school and medical records
- money, bankbook, passports
- credit cards
- keys-house/car/office
- driver's license
- medications
- change of clothes
- rental agreements
- address book
- pictures, jewellery
- items of sentimental value
- children's favourite toys
Thank You
Thank You to the Family Life for these details. Family Life are a not for profit community organisation based in Melbourne. You can visit their website at www.familylife.com.au or contact them on 03 9598 2133
Internet Safety
You may be at risk if you have visited domestic violence websites to search for information or support services. There are ways to erase your computer records. You can erase the history of the sites that you have recently visited by doing the following:
Internet Explorer
Click on “Tools” on the drop down menu at the top of the page. Select “Internet Options” and then “General”
Under “History” there is a button that says “Clear History”. This will remove the trail of website pages that you have recently visited.
Whilst these methods clear the immediately obvious internet history on your computer, it may not completely delete records. The safest way to access information on the internet would be on an independent computer. These could be at the local library, internet cafe or at a friend’s or family member’s house.
If you are receiving abusive emails, maintain a record of the emails, as you may need these in the future as evidence. Email browsers are not generally passworded and easily accessible by anyone. For a secure email account, you can set up an email on the internet for free that requires a login code and password. For example: Set up a hotmail account at www.ninemsn.com.au or a yahoo account at www.yahoo.com.au
